I’m wholesome and energetic, however my legs have plenty of scars, together with a seven-inch incision from a latest surgical procedure. I’m attending an occasion that asks individuals to put on cocktail apparel. My good clothes are all just under the knee or knee size. Do I put on pantyhose or exhibit all my scars, blemishes and different issues that come associated with life and age? — Susan, Del Mar, Calif.
In a world of Instagram filters, Photoshop, fillers, Botox, lasers and each different physique therapy below the solar, it may be stunning to take a look at your precise untouched self. Marks that after signaled a life properly lived — or adventurously lived, or dangerously lived, or joyfully lived; of ache skilled and conquered — can now appear a considerably embarrassing signal of wear and tear and tear, or human frailty. And nobody needs to be giving worn-down vibes.
But there may be additionally energy in a refusal to cover. Jane Goodall, the primatologist, simply turned 90, and I liked seeing the celebrations of her life and the way she obtained to right here, a journey writ on her pores and skin. Just lately, Phoebe Philo featured a photograph within the advert marketing campaign for her new line that confirmed a close-up picture of a abdomen full with stretch marks. And I’ve all the time admired Padma Lakshmi’s willingness to point out her scars, together with the seven-inch one on her higher arm from a automotive accident when she was a youngster.
That scar was entrance and heart final yr throughout her Sports activities Illustrated swimsuit shoot. Afterward, she obtained a whole lot of questions on why she hadn’t lined it up with make-up or airbrushed it away. “It’s what units me aside and makes me me, and even when somebody may wave a magic wand I actually don’t suppose I might select to get rid of my scar,” she stated.
Which just about says all of it.
It additionally suggests to me that the pendulum could also be swinging away from plastic-y perfection. In spite of everything, after we erase our experiences from our our bodies, we lose greater than only a mark.
And the extra we see of such “flawed” photographs offered not, in reality, as flawed however as unremarkable, the extra our understanding of magnificence will alter and develop. I all the time consider the sculptor Marc Quinn’s collection of heroic marble sculptures of the thalidomide era, the British kids born with malformed or lacking limbs on account of an anti-nausea drug taken throughout being pregnant within the late Fifties and early ’60s.
By treating their grownup selves with the identical appreciation Michelangelo reserved for his David, Mr. Quinn successfully modified the definition of who will get to be placed on a pedestal.
I do know it may be uncomfortable to be on the bleeding fringe of this kind of motion, to be the one individual in a room with traces in your brow, or stretch marks on the seaside, or a scar in your shin. And on the subject of seen scars, it’s important to be keen to endure the questions you’ll in all probability get.
However the extra individuals confront others with their actuality, the extra we normalize what is definitely regular life, the higher for everybody. Additionally, you don’t have to fret about nylons or leg make-up or having to discover a new, longer skirt (or trousers). And on the very least, the scar is usually a speaking level.
My husband has an enormous scar on his knee from childhood, and at any time when anybody asks how he obtained it, he says “bear assault.” That’s not truly true, nevertheless it’s a very good icebreaker.
All of which to say: Sure, it’s best to put on your scars with the identical delight chances are you’ll put on a bag from the Row or Alaïa platforms. You’ve earned them.
Your Fashion Questions, Answered
Each week on Open Thread, Vanessa will reply a reader’s fashion-related query, which you’ll be able to ship to her anytime by way of electronic mail or Twitter. Questions are edited and condensed.
